Random Facts about me or things that I've learned about myself lately:
(1) I'm a "Golden Girls" addict - I'll watch it anytime, any place - it's my comfort show.
(2) I worry that my mom and I won't ever be as close as we used to be - and that she won't ever be proud of me again.
(3) I've discovered that I'll let people that aren't very close to me share in my happiness and flirtations - but that I'll hardly let anyone share my pain.
(4) I've never been afraid to open my heart before - I've always taken the risk, but lately I feel like it's in a cage, and I've lost the key.
(5) I'll always wish that he had chosen me instead of her, but now I'm learning to accept that I can't change this and it's a waste of my time to put any energy into thinking about it. I consider that progress.
(6) I don't care about what my ex-boyfriend is doing at all; I thought I'd care more.
(7) I hardly ever make eye contact with people. I get scared that people will be able to see the pain behind my eyes - or that I'll finally meet someone that can see right into my soul.
(8) I've learned that I'm not quite at the level that I want to be with self-acceptance; I've decided that it's a life-long journey, and I'm here for the entire trip.
(9) I believe that one day things will get better.
(10) I miss having a standard - I'm really good at driving a stick.
(11) I've learned that sex never equals attraction; sometimes it just equals opportunity.
(12) People surprise the hell out of me sometimes; I love when someone surprises me in a good way.
(13) I want more than anything else for someone to want to understand me and for someone to learn how to understand me - but it also scares me to death.
(14) I've watched Christmas Vacation at least 50 times in my lifetime.
(15) I love hip-hop music - it always lifts me up - and it always makes me want to dance.
(16) I went to a strip club for my last birthday - at my request.
(17) Some people that I've reconnected with from high school - it's really interesting and enjoyable to see how they are now, see their beautiful children, and read about their daily lives - but some people that add me - they were the same people that ignored me, didn't see me at all, or made rude comments about me to my face or behind my back. Those people may have forgotten that, but I never will.
(18) Sometimes I like to listen to sad songs and just cry - to let everything out, so I can get over it and move on.
(19) I was verbally abused by an alcoholic for years; it's taken me many years to try to heal from this - I'm not even close yet.
(20) I lost one of the most important dreams that I've ever had - I try not to think about, because it makes me feel groundless.
(21) I talk to my animals constantly - they love it and most of them run to my bedroom when they hear me talking to one of them or "dancing" and cuddling with one of them.
(22) I hate to wear shoes; I'd rather be barefoot all of the time.
(23) I want someone to save and for that same person to save me.
(24) I sometimes forget to put more (some...hehe) clothing on, before I open the back door to let the dogs out.
(25) I'm still surviving.
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